Eating Disorder Awareness 2018: Day 7

I realized I needed help when my firstborn was almost 4 years old. I was a full time student and a primary caregiver to my grandmother who had Alzheimer’s. I was in an unhealthy marriage. I was stressed to the max and overwhelmed. I was scared. I weighed in at 83 pounds, couldn’t sleep for days at a time, suffered horrible migraines, and literally hated everything about myself.
I used alcohol, opiates, antidepressants, and anti-anxiety meds to try to survive. I was in therapy, yet I was in large part self-medicating. One night, I overdid it, and was lucky to have woken up the next morning. I called my therapist and she got a team together to start putting my treatment plan in place. She saw my desperation to stay alive so that I could be Mommy to my baby. I am thankful she believed in me and fought her own battles to see that I got appropriate help. If I had nothing else to live for, I had my baby.
I was sent to Florida for treatment, where I resided in two facilities, and started attended different 12 step meetings. I despised being away from my kiddo, and angry that I missed his 4th birthday. However, that’s where Yoga found me, and I realized my story was to be used for a Higher cause someday.
My healing began 20 years ago. It is a process, not a perfect. Recovery has been a rough ride, and I have good days and bad. When I can’t remember on my own the tools I’ve learned, I have friends and family who jump in to help. Even on my darkest nights, though, I remember the who and why that finally brought me face to face to my most dangerous demon.
This kid, from the moment I first found I was pregnant, gave me a sense of purpose and belonging. My Mommy Status requires that I stay healthy, set a good example, and live my life in accordance to Divine Will.
I didn’t choose to suffer with eating disorders, but I can choose to give up or continue on the fight. I choose to allow God to work through me, because I know somewhere out there someone else needs to know he/she isn’t alone. The struggle is real, but help is out there. 
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Call NEDA now 1-800-931-2237, and if you want, use the form below to contact me, too. You are not alone.

 

Eating Disorder Awareness Week 2018: Day 6

5 Steps to Positive Body Image:
1. Appreciate all that your body can do.
2. Keep a top-ten list of things you like about yourself—things that aren’t related to how much you weigh or what you look like.
3.Remind yourself that “true beauty” is not simply skin-deep.
4. Look at yourself as a whole person. 
5. Surround yourself with positive people.

Challenge: Show us who supports you/recovery. Community-We all have some sort of tribe, support group or community that we do things and surround ourselves with. Maybe your tribe is your local yoga studio, your church group, your running buddies or your family. Who is your community that you love to be with, can’t live with without, and what do you all do together

MY TRIBE:
My sons, daughter, and grandson. They are undoubtedly the loves of my life. Nothing in the world means as much to me as my babies. Every decision I have ever made…the good along with the not so good…have been for these kiddos. My intentions have always been to do whatever it takes to make theirs lives the best possible. They are the reason I keep waking up every morning, and keeping fighting the battle even on my darkest nights.

I also have some of the best friends a girl could ask for. I haven’t always gotten along with other females. However through the years, these Lovely Ladies have helped me understand the importance of having feminine energy surround me and support me. I need it to help me stay healthy and break negative lifestyle and mental patterns. When most everyone else come and go at their own convenience, these Gals show up, invited or not, just to be sure I’m ok. They aren’t afraid to tell me like it is, hold me accountable, and perhaps most importantly, remind me that I’m loved. My Soul Sisters.  

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Do you or someone you know need help? Call NEDA now.
Toll-free Information and Referral Helpline: 1-800-931-2237

Also, feel free to use the contact form below to reach out to me. You are not alone.